#7 — The Ministry of Pain

August 16, 1879. I receive a call while on my night shift. Oh, how I wish I had not received that phone call. The attendant informs me that my wife has passed on under a horrific car accident on the freeway? I am baffled and broken all at the same time. How do I tell my daughter?

Pain,
Oft a friend, oft a teacher,
But now, alas, the reality of your permanence eats my flesh away. Oh, my day’s wailing goes unattended from sunup to sundown,
Shall I wail for all my days?
Hath I, hath I not a life to look forward to?
Hath I, not the liberty to spend thy life as I please?
Why have you come to douse my candle, to rob me of my happiness at such an inopportune time?
Thou knowest that you were not welcome, but you still broke into my house, to torment me!

Pain,
You have worn me down. Never did you extend the chance for us to negotiate, despite the hell you’ve exacted on me,
I lay in the river of my tears where I find refuge, bitter as I may be,
As unpleasant as that floor may be, I lay in it, prostrate,
Truly, heavy is the heart of him who loses a love to the soil of the earth,
Why did you come when I did not summon thee? Who sought for you?
Now you have conspired with the angels of death to take a life so precious to me,
Are you a messenger from the gods? Surely not, absurd.

Pain,
Perhaps all of life is given to suffering?
Cursed beings are we, then, damned with this facility to feel, pain,
Yet, strangely, you still call forth in me greater things,
Things I never knew or thought I had or could do,
Behold, in time, sometimes, the greater things I possess surface,
Perhaps, pain worketh resilience,
Lord! Who knew that you would partner with pain to chasten, to straighten, and to sharpen thee?

Pain,
A friend and a foe,
The aftertaste of you is horrid. Yet, you still manage to make victors in consequence,
You build what otherwise would not have built itself into a state of glory and splendor,
Life is breaking,
Perhaps, just perhaps, pleasure and pain complete each other,
Perhaps, therein lies the balance.

End.